Belizean anecdotes 4
What a fabulous day… my Brazilian friend Jorge von Lebenstein dropped in to visit.. gawd he is an interesting fellow. Bye way of explanation, Jorge is of Spanish descent and Portuguese his actual name is a mouthful Jorge, Domingo, Sanchez, Pedro, Maria, Roberto, Cortez, Drano, Studebaker, Kitchen,Sink,Symthe.
His father had a very interesting family history which Jorje is VERY proud of. …… anyway.. he dropped by to see me , opps forgot.. Jorge a very masculine macho type of guy has a very pronounced lisp which in no way interferes with his job as a colour commentator for Brazilian Midget wrestling. But I digress Jorge stopped by to show me his new tattoo, he loves tattoo’s .
So he says… “Paulo, leth me thow you my new tattoo”
I say.. “ buddy no problem… what this time ?? another picture of snap crackle and pop… everybody
knows how much you love rice krispies”
“no” he says laughing “ dith is something very spethal I did this one for my thainted mother”
Really “I say” intrigued.. ‘where is it’ WELL he drops his jeans and there.. tattooed on his left cheek is a picture of a blood thirsty Mayan bat god devouring the hearts of poor helpless victims om a Mayan alter, large drops of blood spilling over everything
As he is bent over he says “what du you think?’
Got to say I’m stunned.. I say.. Jorge??? You did this for your mother??? How in gawds name is this something that your mother would like mean it’s bloodthirsty and gawd man.. what were you thinking..
He says.. ‘What? are you sthupid don’t you know that the Bat god wasth pathron god of Mothers?? The guy at the tattoo throp thaid it was what all guysthh get when they honor their mothhhherrrrrs”
So I say ‘who was this Tattoo guy’
He says “ buddythees tattoos in Plathencia , the thign on the door thais he wath world famousth…
What to do… so I say “ mano forgive.. me I didn’t understand the psychological and cultural significance of the art.. why it is moving and demonstrative of an intellect whom the subtlety of whimsical yet factual art should grace the human canvas of the posterior.. I would even go so far to say that it should be immortalized in some art museum some day to its rightful place beside.. dare I say it the Mona Lisa”
Now he looks happy
“datths bether “ he says
Then he looks me straight in the eye and says
“ Paulo, I hath bought a thong menths bikini to thow it off and I am thow impwessed with it that I hath decided to never path wind again, in honor oth my mothhhher”
‘Jorge’ says I ‘let me buy you a coke’