god help me

Damn another crazy day!!! Why me,, whoa is me…more like it…

Scoff, if you like BUT this is what happened.

I am minding , my own freaking business, fishing off the end of the peer,where the Thunderboat comes in { note* I am sure the Hokey Pokey has a nice peer too but it’s too far for me..} anyway….I am casting away.. thinking about that big fish I’m going to catch and Minding my OWN business.. not a care in world.. I am EATING fish tonight for sure.. if you catch my fisherman’s drift.

I look up and Wham… there coming down the peer was a whole freaking HERD of “”mennintights” I am wondering, is this dangerous.. could I be shanghaied by a wayward group of piratical Mennintights. I am thinking Ten years before the mast, here, Mutiny on the bounty, Captain Blye, Moby dick.. the whole ball of wax.. never to be seen again.. the headline { Mysterious disappearance of local fisherman , only the rod left behind} I am shocked to say the least…

Then it happens.. one looks down at me and sort .of stares.. so figuring I have got ,to say something.. I say…” Hi , my names Paul , Fritz Hows they hanging there’

He looks at me with distain and says.. “dumbkoph Englander, mienen namen is Man Fred”

So I say.. ‘Okay Man.. then Fred it is and bye the way.. do you feel a wee draft?”

He screams at me “DUMKOPH!!! Minen namen ist MANFRED nicht FRED”

So I say. ‘well pardon me, Fred but it’s kinda obvious that you are aLL MEN if you know what I mean”

Now the guy goes from red to purple.. kinda nice with the colour of the outfit but weird nonetheless. He screams at one of his buddies HERMANN “ getten zie ober herein und explainen to dis Englander mien nammen ist MANFRED”

So the guy walks over.. I want to be polite and all so I wash the fish guts off my hands and reach out to shake and say “hello Mr Herr nice to meet you.” Now I must say.. this guy is a little calmer… he smiles, shakes my hand and pulls out 14 inches of Kielbasa, where he had it I don’t know but anyway.. he offers me a slice which I politely decline and says “ Englander meinen nommen ist HERMANN, nicht Herr.” Now for some strange reason I am thinking bikini lines and wax and other horrible thoughts.. [ funny how the mind works] anyway I say” OHHH I get it your name is HERRMAN as in Hermann Munster, wow.. any relation? “ he says “nein, who??”

So I look over his shoulder and there are a couple more from the herd who have come over.. he says “ und dis ist my bruders.. Weemann and Scrotumann” I can’t help but notice weeman is a midget.. but I have had enough of midgets lately but I am thinking.. I wonder if he got a discount on the bathing suit.

So I turn and say.. “well that wasn’t so hard was it Fred… just a little mixup my apologies…”

He says.. “DU BIST TOTE” now I move quickly to the end of the peer, what to do?? I Don’t know exactly what tote is.. but dead it sounds like to me, and I move slowly towards the back of the peer… and slowly he turns, step by step, and I am screaming NIAGARA FALLS!!! NIAGARA FALLS !!

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